A TOP FIVE LIST! AND A CONVERSATION! What song would you play for us if you had our rapt attention?
“Let’s make this a musical fest”
I apologize in advance, but I can’t stop thinking about how Trump called off the last third of a question and answer session and instead just hung out on stage playing his favorite songs for the audience. I am not thinking about the event for its electoral implications, nor what it says about Trump’s mental state, nor whether various news reports should have followed it more or less fervently. Those are all fine things to consider, serious even. I’m sure that smart, serious people have, by this point, considered them thoroughly. But also, the world is very difficult and we should never waste an opportunity to pause when immensely silly things happen and say, well, “how about that?”
You all, it was so monumentally silly. All of it: the aimless bopping around, the general presence of Kristi Noem (The White Pages’ favorite memoirist!), the fact that Trump signaled the transition from the town hall portion of the evening to the the “standing on stage playing songs he liked” portion of the evening by saying, and mind you, this is a verbatim quote, “You know what we could do, you know? If my guys could do it… let’s make this a musical fest, looky look!”
At least some of the subsequent media reports suggested that Trump “DJ-ed” the event. He did not. He shouted out songs that he wished his “guys” would play and then, when the unseen guys acquiesced to his request, he nodded smugly, as if he had summoned the chosen songs from another dimension. “Would you believe it?” Trump’s unnervingly credulous expression seemed to shout, “The songs are here!”
Now, long time readers know that Donald J. Trump and I do not see eye to eye on the issues facing the American public. In fact, I’ll come out and say it: I don’t think he’ll be a good President. Pretty brave of me, I know. As for matters of character and consideration of the needs of others, would I hold an audience hostage in order to play them songs I like? I hope not, but, well, I sure do love a lot of songs. And I’m only human, which is to say that when I have a song that I love there’s at a least a part of me that wants to pull, if not a Trump, then at least a “Natalie Portman in Garden State”and ask another person to enjoy that song with me.
So that’s what we’re discussing this week. Let’s say you had consent from a generous audience of friends to share one song. What would you play? Don’t overthink it. It doesn’t need to be your favorite song, just one that comes to mind right now. Perhaps you want to play it to inspire a dance party, or because there’s a story behind it, or because you’re trying to process something the song makes you feel and additional ears and hearts would be helpful in that process. Set the scene for us, if you’d like. What would be the ideal listening experience for the song in question? What might we do aftterwards?
Here is my top five:
SONG ONE: “Call Your Girlfriend” by Robyn
What is it? The logical conclusion of a century of social democratic exceptionalism.
No, but what is it about? It’s about how, in a country where nobody has medical or student loan debt, residents can instead spend their lives producing ebullient but somehow still icy electro-pop about the precise way you should break the news to your girlfriend that you’re dating Robyn now.
Why do I want to play it for friends? Because three quarters of the way through the song, there is a keyboard solo that is quite fun to pantomime alone but becomes something much more (sacred? that may be understating it) when an entire group of people pantomimes it together.
Also, because I secretly believe in a “Beetlejuice” reality where, if a group sings this song passionately enough, we all end up dating Robyn.
Any thoughts on setting? “Call Your Girlfriend” immediately transforms any setting into the perfect setting to play “Call Your Girlfriend.” Seriously, try it the next time you’re at the dentist.
SONG TWO: “Dilemma” by Kelly Rowland and Nelly
What is it? The most successful and iconic song by a former member of Destiny’s Child (unverified).